Self care

Manage your Energy as a Sensitive Introvert …

Posted on July 25th, 2017.
Posted in these categories: Introversion, Self care, Video. No Comments

Do you ever feel overwhelmed and guilty at the same time?

Guilty that you ‘should’ be able to get more done in a day?

Guilty that you’ve fallen behind ^again^?

As sensitive introverts it’s easy for us to feel overwhelmed, with our energy fragmented – our internal and external environment can throw up all sorts of obstacles in our way.

This prevents us from feeling peaceful and calm, and makes ‘getting stuff done’ in our business even harder.

We can become overwhelmed by our inner critic, our inner perfectionist, even our own ‘rules’ about what we ‘should’ be able to do in a day.

External factors like the amount of noise around us (too little?, too much?) the temperature and the views/opinions of others can tip us over the edge into overwhelm.

When what you really want is peace, tranquility AND to be able to get stuff done – what’s the solution ?

But wait, there’s more!

Time Management: Why ‘NOT doing’ is vital for your mental well being as an introvert in business.

Posted on January 18th, 2017.
Posted in these categories: Self care, Time Management. 2 Comments

Time Management

When was the last time you linked time management with self care in your mind?

When are you really conscious of how you’re spending your time, and how that’s affecting you physically and mentally?

Do you ever feel drained and wonder why?

I had a lovely restful Christmas break, when I did some things I wouldn’t normally do, (thanks to a very inspiring book). I learned a huge amount about myself and the shifts I need to make to take better care of myself AND be much more successful in my time management.

The implications are huge – for my business and my life, and I want to share the lessons with you!

Prior to my break I’d thought I was doing pretty well; being productive during my working time and keeping up with my email and social media.

But my bad habits were revealed to me bit by bit as I read this very important book, and now there’s no going back – my eyes have been opened!

I’d decided to completely shut off from the internet – no email, no social media – so I could completely unwind and relax.  And in that blissful state …

I noticed the stark contrast between that and what I ‘usually’ do!

But wait, there’s more!

You Are Not Your Business (And Why That Matters)

Posted on August 21st, 2014.
Posted in these categories: Business Matters, Self care. 8 Comments
Your business has an entity separate from 'You'

Your business has an entity separate from ‘You’

Ever had a personal crisis that threatened to consume you?

The death of someone close, a relationship breakup or other major life event.

It pulls the rug out from under you, so you’re flat on the floor and broken (or so it feels).

Your head’s in a muddle, and your thoughts are all over the place.

Any spare energy you have is being used up to get you through the day.

And as the guilt creeps in, you ask yourself “How am I supposed to carry on in my business in this state?”

When you’re a solopreneur, the buck stops with you, of course.

But what if the very thing you do requires all of you  – body, mind, heart and soul ? It requires that you create a special ‘something’ that your client can lean into?

You can’t just go through the motions – you have to *be there* for them.

And when you’re struggling with a personal crisis, that might seem like an impossible task.

But the thing you must remember is you are not your business.

Your business has an energy and an ‘entity’ separate from You.

And to allow it to function as a separate entity, you need to look a little deeper inside ‘You’.

Do you remember those Russian nesting dolls – that stack one inside the other?

As a child I used to love opening these all out, from the biggest one all the way down to the tiniest one.  I was intrigued how at first glance there was only one doll, but secretly hidden inside were all these others !

A bit like you and your business ‘entity’.

You could view your business as the doll on the outside – the biggest most ‘public’ one. The other dolls are well hidden on the inside – the very smallest doll represents the most vulnerable part of you, and it’s this one that needs the most attention in times of crisis.

How can you take care of the smallest 'You'

How can you take care of the smallest ‘You’

How can you take care of the smallest ‘you’?

Stop. Go deep inside. And Listen.

This will enable you to cut through all the fog and jumble in your head, and drop down into a deeper place of knowing in your heart.

Take yourself into a peaceful place – a walk in nature, meditation in your favourite chair, listening to the rain or birdsong to calm your mind.

Get yourself out of your head and into your body, and listen to what comes up for you.

Quieting your mind chatter and being open to receiving a deeper message, is the first step to coming closer to the innermost ‘you’. 

This might take some time to do, as your mind battles to keep things together, but stick with it, and give yourself permission to do this imperfectly.

Ask yourself “What do I really need?”

In the height of crisis, it’s even more important to ask this question. As personal events continue to unfold around you, knowing what you’re really yearning for is essential to keeping fully resourced (and not depleted).

Listen to the answer, and then respond.

You might get conflicting answers, or lots of responses all at once. It might be helpful to write down what comes to you, so you don’t have to ‘think’ too much or make sense of it just yet.

Give yourself what you really need

A good cry, deep witnessing and love, … sleep ?!

Even if you got several answers, you don’t have to stress about which should come first. Once you allow yourself to let go of the guilt and responsibility to keep it all together, and begin to allow your own deep needs to show themselves, your innermost self and your intuition will guide you to what you need and when.

I’ve found it helpful in my own crises to make sure that I have uninterrupted time for myself –  to cry, to journal, to lie in my hammock and stare at the ceiling – even if that means going to bed late, or getting up a bit earlier.

Whatever it is, in whatever way works for you, give it to yourself.

Rinse and Repeat.

In a time of crisis your needs will change from moment to moment and day to day – make sure you check in regularly so you can give attention to fulfilling your needs.

Then you’ll be more able to give to your clients, feeling as resourced as you can be (and not feel guilty because they’re not getting the best of you).

Your business has a separate energy and entity all of its own, even though it’s connected to you. When you remember that, you can ‘detach’ from your business, mentally and energetically, leaving you free to deal with your own personal needs.

Letting go of the guilt and worry while you focus on fulfilling your needs, is the quickest and most effective way to stack up all your inner dolls, and be able to bring the biggest ‘public/business’ doll to be out on top again.

PS. Your business goals, dreams and intentions for your Tribe, are wholly separate from your personal feelings about what’s possible for you.

Over To You:

Got any tips to share on how you handle a personal crisis, and keep your ‘business body’ on ? Remember your sharing can help other people so I’d love to hear any comments you have.

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Photo credits : Many thanks to Alan Alfaro  and J Ronald Lee