Does your writing process take a long time, as you anxiously censor what you write in your blogs or social media posts?
Do you worry what other people might think if you reveal some hidden secret, or reveal something that’s not ‘freshly washed and ironed Sunday best’?
Do you find that your writing process includes a ‘cleansing element’ as you try to get rid of anything that might cause people to ‘not like you’?
I had an experience recently that illustrates this issue perfectly.
I’m re-reading a book that I’d read many years ago called Conversations with God (Book One), and finding it so powerful and enlightening. I knew the gems within it should be shared more widely so that other people could learn from this amazing writing.
Then I stopped myself and thought:
Hmmm, I’m not sure I can share that, people might think I’m weird, reading a book about talking to God, (and I imagined my daughter saying “Who does that???” )
Then I got to thinking … actually spirituality is really important to me, and I’d like spiritual books and teachings to be more prevalent in my life – so my life is enriched and not depleted by mindless rubbish that’s so easily available on social media and on the internet.
Then I realised – it’s probably not just me who feels censored. But wait, there’s more!
It’s been a whole year since I created my first video blog,
and since then I’ve gone through a whirl of change and much progress, in terms of my confidence and my clarity of purpose and message in my business!
My first video, although terrifying to do at the beginning, was easy because I wasn’t talking about anything ‘useful’ – I was just talking about ‘nothing in particular’, and getting used to this strange new way of communicating and being visible!
I’ve taken lots of courses and training on how to write articles and how to create videos …. and they were great and I learned loads!
But I had a teeny problem in that I thought I had to do this ‘properly’, and that meant thinking of an important topic, writing a script and practising, and making sure there were no mistakes in the video!!
I wrote a blog last year about how refreshing it is to take on the possibility of ‘just doing video’ (instead of spending days writing an article).
It felt great to create that, and more videos after that, and yet I still felt ‘constricted’ in the videos I did produce.
My dream….to just be myself.
Do you ever give yourself a hard time because you *SHOULD* be able to do something ?
Watch the video to listen to my story and how I overcame my ‘SHOULDs’!
Give yourself permission to STOP the negative self talk…
and choose to do the things that make you feel good!
I’d been giving myself a hard time recently because I’ve been doing interviews and putting video content on my blog, and although I have lots of ideas of topics to write about, the thought of sitting down to write made me squirm and adopt my ‘avoidance’ mode…
(you know the one … where you do everything and anything *except* the thing you’re supposed to be doing)
I was good at English as a child, and I’d been telling myself you *should* be able to write … (and be a good girl and get top marks in class!… again)
So I told myself I *have to write articles*.
Yet I’d never stopped to ask myself “Do I enjoy it?”
I’ve been reading Danielle LaPorte’s amazing book The Desire Map, and starting to think about how I really feel about things – and I’ve been noticing more and more what it feels like to be ‘energised and inspired and engaged and excited’ about doing the things I want to be doing.
And so now I know when I’m feeling the exact opposite – dragged down, bored, listless, squirming, stuck, constricted.
That’s what I’ve been feeling when I sit down to write.
I finally gave myself permission to STOP doing it!
How often do you tell yourself you *should* do something?
The second part of this video interview!
Kamala Murphey interviews me on the topic of being authentic, and we have more fun and laughter, as we share together what it means for us and how we can do more of it!.
We discuss the issues around being authentic:
a) What does being authentic mean for me?
b) Why do we avoid it?
c) How can we embrace it?
d) How I use a timeline process with clients to bring them powerful results!
I describe my timeline process to soothe the fears of our younger selves.
I believe that a lot of what holds us back is the avoidance of pain and reluctance to embrace the younger part of ourselves and the memories of hurtful incidents in our past.
Yet I’m also very clear that when we do take the time to listen and to embrace those fears, we CAN resolve those hurts enough to let us step out and do the important work that we’re here to do.
Would you like to learn a technique that will allow you to move through your fears so you can start to take action ?
Continuing my bold exploration into new technology and being visible,
I recorded a video of me being interviewed by Kamala Murphey.
(Kamala helps deeply spiritual women develop the confidence and courage to recognize and say ‘yes’ to their calling. To embolden them to step up in a big way and lead using their heart and feminine strengths – and make great money doing so. You can check out Kamala’s work here. )
This video is in two parts – part 2 will be posted in the next blog!
What’s in the video part 1?
As well as having fun and giggling a lot (and a few tears), we discuss the topic of being authentic
a) I tell the story of the origins of Happy Being You, and what led me to train as a coach.
b) I give my version of the two biggest benefits to being authentic
This is another big stretch out of my comfort zone!
After editing the video (which took me forever in iMovie!) I had a mini-panic thinking
“Is it too long?”,
“Will anyone want to watch it?”.
Yet, as ever in these things, I’ve produced this with guidance from the Universe, and I trust that it will be helpful to some people, and will bring inspiration to others!
If that’s you, then thank you for watching!!
I’ve had the most incredible two weeks ever!!!
It started with my mad idea to do a video blog , and then I did another one. I had such a wonderful warm response from people on Facebook and replies by email – it really made it doubly fulfilling for me to have inspired people by just being me!
Then things took an unexpected, but fabulous twist!
I’d heard that Twitter brings about rapid response to complaints, so I logged in to send a message to my electricity supplier.
Whilst I was there I connected with the amazing Corrina Gordon Barnes (whose courses have been transformational for me, I might add).
Someone who followed Corrina, then followed me, and before I knew it, I’d been invited to attend an awesome gathering of inspiring women.
The ‘old’ me would not even have been on Twitter, let alone conversing with people who’ve got *loads of followers*.
I juggled all the logistics to make sure that I’ll be there at the conference in person, to meet with these multi-passionate women and share their stories and mine.
Who is this person that can make all that stuff happen?
She’s a part of me who I discovered many years ago during my NLP training.
She’s my creative, confident, powerful self who makes things happen, and who effortlessly connects with and inspires people, just by being herself.
Her name is Madam Zizzi (that’s the name that came to me when I met her).
Before my Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) training I lived my life in almost constant fear and anxiety (and mostly hiding from people), because my ‘damaged child’ was trying to live my life for me.
I trained in NLP in order to heal myself, and what I found was a deep treasure trove of different parts of ‘ME’.
The initial exploration was one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done – to open my wounds, so they could get some light and air.
But it was worth it, and I did heal.
My inner child is not terrified anymore – she knows she’s safe, and she can relax and let the other parts of me take over (most of the time!).
That’s all very well, I hear you say – but how can I do that?